Thursday, January 05, 2006

Difficult Details

'Just For Now'

It's that time of year
Leave all our hopelessnesses aside
if just for a little while
Tears stop right here
I know we've all had a bumpy ride
I'm secretly on your side


How did you know?
It's what I always wanted
You can never have too many of these
Will ya, quit kicking me under the table
I'm trying, will somebody make her 
Shut up about it!
Can we settle down please?


It's that time of year
Leave all our hopelessnesses aside
if just for a little while
Tears stop right here
I know we've all had a bumpy ride
I'm secretly on your side


Bite Tongue, deep breaths, count to 10, nod your head.


(sniff sniff) i think something is burning
No you've ruined the whole thing
Muffle the smoke alarm


Whoever put on this music
had better quick sharp remove it
Pour me another 
and don't wag  your finger at me


It's that time of year
Leave all our hopelessnesses aside
if just for a little while
Tears stop right here
I know we've all had a bumpy ride
I'm secretly on your side


Get me out of here
Get me out of here
Get me out of here


A trilogy of songs in three days serves to color the tastelessness of these white walls. What else is there but to hope. In salvation. In some deep well. In some quiet moment a light must come to take away all weariness. Lift the spirit. Deliver an ounce of courage. We can only take in everything. It's only real in your head. But that's you. And what can I do? So hold on. Cry if you must. Shake if you have to. Tremble if you are. The game is mine to lose. But it burns me every time. And I can only watch as my ashes fall slowly to earth. And when I can't take it anymore I close my eyes and close all the doors that lead to the heart of dreaming. But then I'll be of no use to you. So waves of regret and disappointment wash away the only sandcastle I have. Only to build again and again and again. Light, too much light. Too many promises. I can't hold you tight enough. Slipping from my arms and I feel helpless to stop it. Please don't break me. Still I stare at you. Waiting for something. Anything. But nothing. Is clicking. Is forming. Is happening. Deep inhale. Ready steady. I'm gonna have a heart attack. Put on our faces. Shake off the rain. Tie our shoelaces tight. Here we go. (hopes and fears) Again.

Jeez. What a mess. I feel like I trashed the place.

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